Thursday, July 30, 2009

When Will it End?

I'm really sick of this bad economy and living hand-to-mouth. I'm feeling frustrated. Come on, people! There are still plenty of folks out there that have money and they need to let go of some of it. I know, I know... the unemployment rate is over the moon and those that still have jobs are scared that they'll lose them. But, the talking heads are saying this week is that we've hit the bottom of the recession. Housing sales are up. The "Cash for Clunkers" program is generating a lot of income for car dealerships. (Not to mention helping get those gas-guzzling, smoke spewing wrecks off the road.) The stock market is up, and bailed-out banks are making a profit.

Maybe I'm feeling this way because of several unexpected expenses I've incurred lately. It seems like the money train is stalled on the tracks and the expense train has passed me. Now, my car is requiring some expensive repairs that can't wait, and, even though it's ten years old, it's not a clunker because it gets 24 miles per gallon. (And, I couldn't afford to buy a brand new car, anyway.) I never over-used my credit card until now. I always paid off the balance within a couple of months, but there's just no other way to pay for these things, and I now understand how you can get in over your head. I'm just grateful that I only have ONE credit card, unlike many people.

Sometimes I wonder if I should get a job working for someone else (if I could find one) but, dammit, this IS my job! I'm an artist. An independent business woman. I hate it when artists are told they don't have a "real job", and the term "starving artist". It's demeaning. I spent a good portion of my life making a comfortable living at this, not to mention that I paid money to learn how to do it. It annoys the heck out of me that the arts are given such a low priority on both public and private budgets. Even our local independent radio station is doing an emergency fund-raising this week because the state cut $21,000 from their budget. This all reminds me of Reagan's "trickle down effect", but not in a positive way. I'll be slashing my personal budget even more after getting the car fixed.

I'm a big believer in the Law of Attraction, positive thinking, and all that crap, so I really should quit whining and maybe use the time I would usually spend making jewelry in meditation instead. I'd really like to have some forward motion on the old money train. OK. I'm done venting now. Ohmmmmmmmm.


Anonymous said...

i hear ya, i hope things get better soon!

Mitzi Miles-Kubota, Painting and Writing for REAL said...

My husband, who can occasionally be a pretty smart guy, says what we have to work with is "now" and "what." The "how" is in the Tao. We gotta let the Universe figure it out. But sometimes a good ole pity party is cleansing to the system. I engage in them with far too much frequency. And there's my husband, blithely sailing through a sea of trouble, never losing his composure. Sometimes I could just SMACK him!